Monday, July 27, 2015

Stream of consciousness


The metronome of the chirping cricket pierces the serenity of the drip drop of the flowing water. Surprisingly, it's not annoying. Its interlude is in fact quite ... amalgamating? Is that a word? One side of the four petals of the fountain is flowing short, she notices. Following that thought comes another thought, which is, that, it’s quite brilliant she can make up the petal analogy for the flowing sides of the fountain. There isn’t anyone who is going to know that! There is a light in the far away window. It had earlier painted a nauseatingly domestic picture of a family having dinner, laughing and burping and sharing days’ worth of missed words! She turns her head away from that. There is a slight movement near the bush… probably frogs or something sinister that has been making the wheezing sound. A garden snake slithers into the fountain lake. It could be a light twig moving in the wind. Said wind carries the tantalizing aroma of drying grass settling down for the sultry night of promising rain. Its quiet erotic if one is into that sort of thing! Sprawling further comfortably on the dry lawn she turns her head heaven wards! Heaven ward! Again, nice phrasing! Is that light that’s twinkling far to the west some bright star...probably Venus or simply just a tower with blinky light?
Ah, who cares!
Ti-ting announces the sound. The first thing that pops in the mind "I'm not going to talk every again!" makes her chuckle. Like a drunken promise, I-won’t-talk-again has been broken many number of times that it has become a reflex to think that with every sigh.

Hey, she says wearily with all intentions to avoid talking.

Hi, comes a sort of bored automatic response!

This breaks the wont-talk idea into smithereens and brings the gruff reply; I have heard all that you have say.

And yet, and yet..

Time lapses into the sort of silence which precariously balances on the weak one's will to keep it together.

Maybe I’am the problem

Hmm. Maybe!

DON'T start!

On comes the complicated roll of eyes

This time it’s the other one who plays the card

The things you take for granted someone else is praying for.

Uh! rolls in the downward turn of the lips. Not exactly what I asked for.

You don’t know the end game

What do I care about the end? Don’t like the current play

You know, giving up is easy

Now! I have heard this bullshit from many people many times. It’s not about a moment’s mad decision. It is a culmination of a millions of indecisions having no point to play

The fountain flows fracturedly into the windy night

Look around you, look at the beauty, says the tiny Voice of the Head!

It'd still be beautiful tomorrow.

You don’t know that.

I don’t have to.

If you don’t like what you have, try and change it.

What if trying is what is killing you.

Don’t be dramatic. It will definitely be alright!

You know, everyone needs a purpose in life. Something to hold on to – a faith. A reason. A finger. A hope. Atleast. Something.

I think you like being this way

No. And that’s the point

Isn’t there no fight left in you.

I still have you. Annoyingly! But what else is the point. Fight and then fight some more! Where is the peace!

Peace is when you want it.

Exactly.

The last light in the far away curtain goes off for the night. Symbolic, that is.

Until the morrow!

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